Mentorship — Life Coaching, but Free!

I don’t know why, but, it seems that mentoring is back in the news (i.e. I am seeing a lot of stories on it). So, of course, I’m jumping on the bandwagon, because, you know, that’s me!

Nah, I’m not going to get into the kind of stuff that you read in all the other posts. I just want to share my experiences and insights (which, in a minor form, is what mentoring is).

I’ve written about how you should train all of your employee’s to take your job (unless they don’t want it, then help them on their journey to wherever they want to go).

Mentoring IS teaching, coaching, encouraging, and anything else; positive AND negative, to help a person achieve their professional AND personal goals.

Personal goals? Yes.

Kinda like life coaching (I guess life coaching is paid mentoring).

There are many times that I talk with someone about their professional goals and it turns personal. A great example of this is when I’m helping a friend start their business. We talk about markets, product, services, etc. And then we get to funding. This almost always turns personal.

“How much money do you have?”

“How much credit do you have?”

“Is your spouse behind this endeavor?”

“Are you going to work from the house? What hours?”

“What are you going to do with the kids?”

You get the idea. This IS mentoring. You can draw on your experience and share with them what you have seen and learned over the decades. Sometimes the discussions turn into marriage counseling (like “My spouse thinks I am wasting money on this”). Sometimes it turns negative and you have to let the person know that what they want to achieve is going to be hard, very hard.

Here’s an example. I was helping a young mother (in her 30’s), start her business. I sat down with her and her husband. I was asked to come in and help them set up their marketing program. Ten minutes in, I was asking some of the above questions (she had this business operating already, doing it part-time and now wanted to make it full-time).

She had most of the above questions (and many more) answered, until we got to funding — or revenue. We took an existing client, broke down what they paid, broke down her hours, broke down her cost of goods, etc. and discovered that she was working for a little over a $1.50 an hour.

Needless to say, she was distraught, and her husband was not happy.

After a few hours, we were able to get it up to over $20.00 an hour, with, unfortunately, her having to raise her rates significantly. At first, she balked. She knew her market and what they could afford. I disagreed and told her to trust me — and raise her rates by over 1000%.

She did with her next client. And didn’t get the account. She did it again. And got the deal. And then again, she pitched her service and got declined. And then did again, and got it. She turned her market, which was willing to pay her $1.50 an hour to one that now paid her over $50.00 an hour (after all costs — pure profit). She opened up a whole new market that she thought was unattainable because of her age, experience, etc.

Twenty years later, she now has her own TV show, she makes more than $500.00 an hour, and her husband and family are way better off because of it.

Was that mentoring or just good business. It was both. She has stated to me many times over the years that if she had not sat down with me, she would have given up after a few more accounts and gone to work for some company.

Mentoring is that. Nudging, even pushing, the mentored into uncomfortable places and positions.

One of the greatest sayings a mentor ever said to me is “There are only two ways to get someones attention (without violence); one is to put money in their pockets and the other is to take money out of their pocket.”

When I first heard this, I was a little astounded, that something so simple is what really makes the world go around. I have used it with everyone I have mentored. Yes, even those that have nothing to do with revenue, or marketing, or the overall business. For example, I mentored a programmer. She was one of many programmers for an organization, but, she came to me asking about going back to school and getting an MBA. (Why? She wanted to change careers. But that’s another story.) So back to what she was doing now, I said the above to her and she asked “But I just do what they tell me to do, how is that statement useful to me?” My response was “When you are told to do something, you should think of that quote. The code that you are going to write, will it put money in someones pocket or take it out? Will it help them save money or lose money?” She said she never thought of it that way and my response was, “Start thinking like that”. If you are asked to do something that you think does not do this for a client, then, ask your superior why you are doing it. It may become obvious why, or, and this is the best part, the superior might question why they are doing it (which then will cause the company, division, group, to focus on items that will help the company). Yes, this is managing upwards, and I encourage every employee, to always manage upwards (of course, micro managers and control freaks won’t appreciate it, but,those that are successful will).

Mentoring is so many things — and some mentors don’t want to help with things that they are uncomfortable with, don’t like, or just don’t want to. With that said, I would suggest that you get a different mentor. Mentors should always be ready to help you with whatever you want or need help with. Most people who want to be mentored come to you because of your experience, knowledge, business sense, or whatever. Don’t let them down and not help them the best you can.